When I think of where I was at last year on this holiday, compared to now, I have to laugh at how in control I was trying to be and how clueless I actually was. Finley was just about 4 months old and we hadn't found our rhythm quite yet. We went out to brunch with my family, we were late because we are always late and having a baby magnified that. She was cranky during brunch, I felt like a zombie who was still carrying the baby weight, and I broke my breast pump on our trip home. I spent most of my first mother's day in tears. And now, a year later, it all just makes me laugh! Motherhood is so crazy. I've never experienced such a wide array of emotions, some at the same time, like I have as a mother. I've learned to let a lot go, most of which I haven't missed, and I gained a whole lot more. I have such a visceral love for Finley - it makes my heart ache in a good way when I think too much about it. I am as happy now with Finley finishing her dinner or learing a new word or dancing with me in the kitchen or taking a long nap or laughing, as I used to be with a perfectly placed home accessory or a trunk full of shopping bags. I've learned to simplify our lives and to relax when I get the chance. And the best part is, I'm still learning about being the best mom for Finley - everyday! I am so excited to see our life a year from now. Hopefully I will continue to grow as a mother and my girl and I will strengthen our bond.
I'm thankful for my own mom - super mom who always gave my sister and I everything she had, ran our lunches up to school when we forgot, who fields my daily phone calls, who weeds my garden (and my neighbors for that matter!), and who supports me no matter what; for my mother-in-law who I just got to spend a beautiful few days with in Mexico and who has welcomed me into her family with open arms and makes amazing bacon! ; for my sister-in-law Erin who has set a great example of motherhood; and for all of my mom friends who have given my countless pieces of advice and listened to my crazy stories and laughed with me. These ladies make me love my role as a mother even more!
Today we celebrated with brunch at Brick's, a family nap, homemade cake - with mom (me) allowed to lick the bowl, and getting a storm door. - on my wish list ;) I couldn't think of a better way to spend it :)
Happy Mother's Day to all the mom's I know and prayers for those that I know who are longing to be a mom.
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